St. Patty’s Day

18 03 2005

Well today was my birthday. I’ve been impressed and grateful for all the folks who have gone out of their way to wish me a happy birthday. I need to remember and do the same. I was treated to an amazing birthday dinner and great evening, remembered by many and had some fun stuff come through. Now without diminishing any of the other thoughtful birthday wishes and messages, I do want to share with you the most amusing.

A friend of mine, an attorney, was answering some questions about work and mentioned “last will and testaments”. I joked with her that now that I’m getting old that I need one. She graciously complied with my tongue and cheek request and dished it back with some special sauce. This is a bit long but, worth skimming especially where it looks like comments are added. Names are changed to protect the not so innocent. 🙂

LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT

OF

CLARK BURBIDGE

I, Clark Burbidge (also known as the “Lunch Guy”), of Sugarhouse, Utah, make this my last will, hereby revoking all earlier wills and codicils. I do not by this will exercise any power of appointment.

FIRST: I give all my tangible personal property to [Name of my attorney friend] except some my most prized possessions (which she would never want anyway), namely my beautiful Mercedes, all bio-diesel making materials and vegetable oil I leave to the Bio-Diesel Foundation of Utah (the one that I am president of).

All the residue of my tangible personal property not disposed of as provided above shall be disposed of as my personal representative, in my personal representative’s discretion, sees fit, whether by gift or by sale and whether to individuals (other than my personal representative) or institutions named or not named otherwise in this will or a codicil. This power shall be exercisable by my personal representative in a personal as opposed to a fiduciary capacity. Should any items be sold, the net proceeds of sale shall be disposed of as part of my residuary estate as provided below in Article FIFTH.

The expenses of insuring, storing, packing, and delivering any items of my tangible personal property bequeathed under this Article FIRST shall be borne by my residuary estate as an expense of administration.

SECOND: I give and devise my real estate known as my house in Sugarhouse to [Name of my attourney friend], if she is living on the thirtieth day after my death, free of any mortgages secured on such real estate and any real estate taxes assessed as of the date of my death.

THIRD: I give all my cash to [Name of my attorney friend].

FOURTH: I give all my ownership interest in my Limited Liability Company to [Name of my attourney friend].

FIFTH: I give and devise the residue of all the property, of whatever kind and wherever located, that I own at my death (my “residuary estate”) to [Name of my attorney friend]

Anything that [Name of my attorney friend] does not want (which will probably be a lot of things) shall automatically be given to my favorite charities, Wild Utah, Green Peace, PETA and the American Association of Recyclers.

All federal and state taxes in the nature of estate, inheritance, succession, and like taxes occasioned by my death with respect to property passing under this will or a codicil shall be paid from and borne by the portion of my residuary estate disposed of under paragraph (a) of this Article; and, to the extent that such portion is insufficient to pay in full all such taxes, the unpaid balance of such taxes shall be paid from and borne by the portion of my residuary estate disposed of under paragraph (b) of this Article.

Any net income or capital gains earned or realized with respect to any property passing under this Article FIFTH that is properly allocable to the charitable distribution under paragraph (b) above shall, within one year after the close of the calendar year in which such net income or gains are earned or realized, be paid over to the recipients of the distribution or be set aside for such recipients.

SIXTH: I name my dad, as my personal representative. References in this will or a codicil to my “personal representative” mean the one or more personal representatives (or executors, temporary executors, or administrators with this will annexed) for the time being in office. No personal representative named in this will or a codicil need furnish any bond or surety on any official bond, as the case may be; and, if applicable, my estate shall be subject to independent administration only. In any proceeding relating to my estate, including the allowance of an account of my personal representative, and in any jurisdiction in which either of the following is applicable, (a) I request the Court to dispense with the appointment of a guardian ad litem to represent any person or interest, and (b) I direct that service of process upon any person under disability shall not be made when another person not under a disability is a party to the proceeding and has the same interest as the person under the disability.

SEVENTH: In addition to other powers, my personal representative shall have power from time to time at discretion and without license of court: To retain, and to invest and reinvest in, any kind or amount of property; to vote and exercise other rights of security holders; to make such elections for federal and state estate, gift, generation-skipping transfer, and income tax purposes as my personal representative may deem advisable; to compromise or submit to arbitration any matters in dispute; to borrow money, and to sell, mortgage, pledge, exchange, lease, and contract with respect to any real or personal property, all without notice to any beneficiary and in such manner, for such consideration and on such terms as to credit or otherwise as my personal representative may deem advisable, whether or not the effect thereof extends beyond the period of settling my estate; and, in distributing my estate, to allot property, whether real or personal, at then current values in lieu of cash.

EIGHTH: References in this will or a codicil to “child” or “children” (oh wait I never got married so this section doesn’t apply to me) mean descendants in the first degree only, and references to “issue” mean descendants in the first, second, or any other degree; in each case meaning all descendants of the ancestor designated, whether by blood or by adoption. Whenever distribution is to be made by right of representation to the then living issue of a designated ancestor, the ancestor’s children shall be considered the stocks for purposes of determining the respective shares of such issue.

References in this will or a codicil to a “qualified charitable organization” mean an organization described at the time of my death in Section 2055 of the Internal Revenue Code of 1986, as amended, bequests to which qualify for the federal estate tax charitable deduction.

WITNESS my hand this ___ day of _______, 20__

________________________
Clark Burbidge

Signed, published, and declared by the above-named Clark Burbidge as and for his last will, in the presence of us two who, at his request and in his presence and in the presence of each other, hereto subscribe our names as witnesses, all on the date last above written.

Before me, the undersigned authority, on this day personally appeared Samuel A. Sample, and ,

known to me to be the testator and the witnesses, respectively, whose names are signed to the foregoing instrument, and all of these persons being by me duly sworn, Samuel A. Sample, the testator, declared to me and to the witnesses in my presence that the instrument is his last will, that he willingly signed it, and that he executed it as his free and voluntary act for the purposes therein expressed; and each of the witnesses stated to me, in the presence of the testator and in the presence of each other, that he or she signed the will as a witness at the request and in the presence of the testator and in the presence of each other, and that to the best of his or her knowledge the testator was eighteen years of age or over, of sound mind, and under no constraint or undue influence.

Clark Burbidge, Testator

__________________
Witness

___________________
Witness

Subscribed and sworn to before me by the said testator and the said witnesses, this ___ day of _______, 20__.

Advertisements

Actions

Information

One response

18 03 2005
Paul

morbid…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s




%d bloggers like this: